just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
