**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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