no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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