i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
