You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
