Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
