she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
