afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
