im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
