Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
