I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
