For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
dude. I can hear the air.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
