i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I deserve this hangover.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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