I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I have demons in me.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
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