Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
