That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
