Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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