There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
