i barfeds in our rink
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
