Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
