The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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