i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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