we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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