There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
