If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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