I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I love you.
Bad choice
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