Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
