Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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