This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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