She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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