I want to stick my p in your. b.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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