I'm lost and stupid without you.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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