I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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