Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
