he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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