nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
