Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize