just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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