i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
