what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
