The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I FOUND THE LEGS
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
We smell like vodka and hangover
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