Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Randomize
