I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You're like the curious george of whores
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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