This is not my ceiling
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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