Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the day after is always just damage control
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
