The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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