It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
