I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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