i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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