party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
