Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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